please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Randomize
