Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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