my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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