dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Randomize
