I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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