I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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