My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
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