Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
