Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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