we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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