We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
