White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
