Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
It's rum buckets o'clock
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
