im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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