physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
jump out the window naked night went bad
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