is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
50% drunk capacity currently
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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