why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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