What a fucking waste of an outfit
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize