i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize