This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
