wake up i wanna do it froggy style
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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