no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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