Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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