So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
