Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
