im gay
i know
yea but for you.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
