i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I am naked and annoyed.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
