I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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