I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
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And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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