Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Semen is not good for contacts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize