just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
