We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize