just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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