I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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