The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
