Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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