i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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