I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
