we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
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