Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
