Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize