Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
