I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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