Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
you inspire me to be a worse person
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
