I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
