We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize