Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
