OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
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