There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Randomize
