hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
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