what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
